Moving On
by fuma.is.waiting
Summary: An accident causes Rodney McKay to revert back to a child, everyone gets a glimpse into the past that he tried so hard to hide.
1. A Little Problem

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the character involved in SG: A… I only wish I did…

Author's Note: Hello all! This is my first attempt at fanfiction, so hopefully you all enjoy this. I wanted to write a story to explain why McKay is well… McKay. I really like his character and when I got the idea for this story, my mind went into overdrive. The story should be anywhere from 7 to 10 chapters, with updates ever week.

And PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW! I thrive on comments and criticisms, so please tell me what you think!

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"McKay! What did you do this time?" Sheppard yelled as he entered the science lab. Sheppard had been talking to Dr. Weir when the light in Atlantis flickered and a loud booming noise was heard coming from the labs. He knew that this could only mean one thing, Rodney McKay.

"Colonel," it was Zelenka who answered him. "I don't think that you're going to like this but, I must ask that you don't raise your voice at the moment. Things are a little complicat…"

Sheppard cut him off before he could finish. "I'll do whatever the hell I want to. Just tell me where McKay is, so he can tell me what the hell he did."

Zelenka sighed knowing that there was no point in arguing with the colonel when he was mad and pointed to the corner of the lab. John quickly moved to where the doctor had pointed. "Rodney, I swear if you broke anyth..."

"I'M SORRY," shouted a very small and very scared voice from the floor in front of Sheppard. John had expected when he came into the lab to see Rodney furiously trying to explain that whatever had happened was in no way his fault. Instead, Colonel Sheppard was stunned to find a little boy with brown hair and blue eyes in a shirt that was many sizes to big, huddled in the corner. "I'm sorry. I'm not sure what I did but I'm sorry! Please don't tell dad, I'll fix whatever I broke just please don't tell my dad." The pleading boy was almost in tears.

"McKay?" John voice had softened considerably. When the boy nodded slightly, Sheppard kneeled down to get a better look, the boy tried to backed up into the wall. It was then that he noticed that all the other scientist and lab assistants were on the other side of the room. He and Zelenka were the only people closed to the boy.

"This is what I tried to tell you, an artifact that we were studying suddenly activated. The next thing we knew McKay had been turned into this child. He remembers nothing of Atlantis and won't let anyone near him without... how do you say... freaking out."

"Great, just great," it was at this moment that John realized that it was going to be a long day. "Hey buddy, my name is John Sheppard. I'm gonna need you to come with me to see Dr. Beckett, okay?" John slowly reached out to grab the small boys hand when Rodney bolted. Sheppard quickly caught McKay and scooped the boy into his arms amazed at how light he was.

"LET ME GO!" Rodney shouted and kicked at the colonel. It was all he could do just to hold on to the boy. Sheppard told Zelenka to inform the doctor that he was heading down to the infirmary with the now child sized McKay and to find some way to fix this problem quick. The struggling stopped, and Rodney sat limply in the Colonel's arms. "Where's Jeanie? What's going on?" Rodney started to ramble softly.

The fight was gone from the small form in John's hands, he noticed that Rodney had gotten quiet as well. Looking down he saw that Dr. Rodney McKay, the astrophysicist, and self proclaimed genius had started to cry.

"Hey now, what's wrong? I'm sorry that I yelled at you, ok? We'll go see the doc, and find out what's wrong ok?" This only seemed to make the kid worse. Sheppard looked around the hall to see if anyone else was around, they were alone. Sheppard gave a sigh as he moved to lean against the wall. Every sudden gesture caused the bundle in his hands to cringe. Sliding down the wall in the sitting position with Rodney in his lap, he took a good hard look at the smaller version of his friend.

He looked about eight years old and Sheppard started to see that resemblance between the older Rodney and the one in his arms, however the boy was surprisingly light. Besides some similar facial features, nothing else about this boy was like the adult. Rodney had a presence about him that made everyone notice him, this child seemed like he wanted to disappear. Something was wrong. "Rodney, hey look at me McKay." The boy looked up slowly. "I know you're scared, okay. Before we go any further, we're gonna have a little chat, ok?" Rodney nodded sheepishly. "Alright, first off, do you know where you are or who I am?" He shook his head. John sighed inwardly, thinking about how this situation could get any worse. "Ok... alright then. I'm Colonel John Sheppard. I'm here to help ok. I need you to tell me what the last thing you remember?"

The boy tensed suddenly and looked down at the floor. John noticed and gently put a hand on his shoulder repeating the question slowly. "Jeanie broke a glass..."

"Okay, good, what else?"

"Dad heard it from upstairs, I told Jeanie to go outside and pretend that she was playing, I didn't want her to get in trouble." John nodded slowly, listening carefully. He kept his hand on Rodney's shoulder squeezing it gently trying to comfort the small boy. It seemed to help slightly, but the more Rodney told the more shaken up he seemed. "Dad came down and saw the mess. He was furious... he started screaming at me, but I said it was an accident. But he just got angrier." Tears started falling down Rodney's face and Sheppard's heart almost stopped as he realized where this was going. "He hit me and I fell onto the broken glass. My hand started bleeding... and that just made him madder. The last thing I remember was dad locking me in the closet again. I woke up and all these people were staring and asking me questions and... And Jeanie's gone... and..." The rest of the explanation was lost in small sobs.

He stared at the small Rodney and did the only thing he could think of. Sheppard wrapped his arms around the shaking form in his lap. Sheppard held the child as he cried, softly telling the boy that it was ok. He heard footsteps coming down the hall and looked up to see Carson. When John hadn't showed up in the infirmary the doctor had come looking for them.

John waved for the doctor to stop. He didn't want the startle the cry boy in his arms. Looked at the scene in front of him, and immediately understood. He would have to wait.

---TBC---


	2. The Story Unfolds

Disclaimers: don't own… only wish I did

AN: Thanks for the reviews! I was so happy that I finished the chapter early. I hope it's to everyone's likings and that it's up to par with the last one. And a little side note, since I don't know the actually age of McKay I decided to use the birth date of the actor who plays him. (David Hewlett's b-day is April 18, 1968) Also, I'm not very good at writing a Scottish accent. So please forgive me, I'm trying. p

Enjoy (hopefully) and Review!

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John Sheppard carried the pint-sized Rodney McKay to the infirmary with Dr. Beckett tailing behind them. It had taken close to ten minutes for Rodney to calm down and allow Sheppard to take him to be checked out by the doctor. The whole way there Rodney watched Carson wearily over John's shoulder. Almost as though, he expected the doctor to do something bizarre. Inside the infirmary, Elizabeth waited with Teyla. They both had been informed of what had happened and their concern showed.

"Okay, lad," Beckett exclaimed as Sheppard place Rodney on a bed. "I'm Dr. Beckett. We're just going have a quick look to make sure you're alright. Then we can figure out this whole mess." Rodney didn't answer; he just nodded slightly trying to make himself as small as possible. He didn't like how everyone was staring at him. They seemed worried about him, but he had never seen any of them before in his life. Carson could see the through the brave face the boy was putting on and tried to alleviate some of his fears by asking him some questions. "Alright, what's the last thing you remember?

When Rodney didn't answer, Sheppard, who had taken a seat next to the bed, answered for him. "He remembers being home, with his sister and his dad. After that, he was in the science labs." Giving Carson a look, he added "I can give you the details later."

"Sounds fine. Now, how old are you?"

"Nine." Carson nodded and continued the exam; checking his temperature, and asking little things. According to the boy the date was October 18, 1977. Rodney could see the surprise and concern on the faces of the two women standing in the back. "It's not nice to stare," Rodney stated coldly as he glared at the women, "especially when I don't know who you are." The last part was quieter as he retreated back into his shell.

"Sorry, Rodney, we didn't mean to be rude. I'm Dr. Elizabeth Weir and this is Teyla Emmagan." Elizabeth stepped closer and offered her hand to the boy. Rodney just looked away.

"Didn't your mother teach you manners?" Carson had made the statement in jest. But the reaction he got was the last thing he expected.

"DON'T TALK ABOUT MY MOM," Rodney screamed. He pushed away from the doctor and tried to get off the bed only to be stopped by John. Something seemed to have snapped inside the boy as John held him in place. "Who are you people and where's Jeanie? What is this place?" And although, McKay's shouting started to grow louder, his breathing was slowly getting more ragged and panicked. "What happened to the cuts on my hand? Tell me what the hell is going on here?" His rant was cut short as he started to grasp for air.

"He's having a panic attack, John hand me that air mask." Sheppard did as he was told and let the doctor do his work. "Alright laddie, I need you to relax okay. Take big slow breathes ok. That's my boy, nice and slow. Easy." The doctor put a hand onto Rodney's trying to comfort him; however, the gesture just made the boy more uncomfortable. His breathing was becoming more erratic as he pushed away from doctor.

"John, I'm gonna need your help." Sheppard stared at the doctor, dumbfounded. "Listen, my presence doesn't seem to be helping Rodney. Just talk to him, he seems to trust you." Looking down at the huddled form gasping for air, Sheppard moved onto the bed with Rodney.

"Hey kiddo," Rodney looked up, but his eyes didn't reach the colonel's face. Sheppard lifted the boy's face with his hand so that he focused only on him. He spoke slowly. "It's okay; we're not going to hurt, Rodney. We're only here to help. Relax, there you go, big breathes." Once the boy's breathing relaxed to a more normal pace, John turned to Dr. Weir. "I think we should just tell him everything, and then figure out what's what."

"That sounds like a good idea." Weir responded. She took a step closer and smiled gently at her now pint-sized friend. "I know this is going to sound crazy and very unbelievable but I need you to keep an open mind, okay?" Elizabeth started to tell the little Rodney everything she knew about the big Rodney. That he was actually a brilliant astrophysicist, and the lead scientist of something called the Atlantis Expedition. And that there had been an accident earlier, causing him to be turned back into a child. However to everybody's dismay, the new information seemed to cause Rodney more grief.

It was a good five minutes after Elizabeth finish explaining the situation that Rodney decided to respond. "Oh God, this can't be happening. I'm hallucinating or something, aren't I? Dad hit me so hard I have brain damage." Everyone except John was taken back by the boy's last comment.

"Listen to me Rodney, this is real." John reached out to him, only to have his smacked away

"NO! This is just a sick joke at my mind is playing on me. I'm going to wake up back home and I'll go back to taking care of my sister and putting up with dad. I'm smart enough to know that all this is just a stupid hallucination. This'll just be another experience I can add on to the long list of how my life sucks." The ranting definitely belonged to Rodney McKay, but the attitude was all wrong.

"Rodney, this isn't a dream." But no matter what they said to him, Rodney refused to believe it. After a point, he stopped responding to them, calling them figments of his overactive imagination. It was at this time, that Dr. Beckett cleared the infirmary stating that the wee boy obliviously needed rest and that hopefully things would be better in the morning. And as if on cue, little Rodney was curled in a ball, asleep.

Teyla and Elizabeth left the room reluctantly while John followed the Doctor into his office. "Well, considering that the cats out of the bag, did you know that McKay's father was an abusive bastard?"

"I guess it's safe to assume that was why he was crying about in the hall earlier." John nodded. Carson plopped into his chair, with a sigh he reached for a one of the files on his desk and opened it. "I've had my suspicions about Rodney's past but as you already know, he never liked to talk about it. This is Rodney's original file, from before he came to Atlantis." Carson tossed the file across the desk, so that Sheppard could see it.

"Isn't this against the whole doctor-patient confidentiality?"

"Aye, it would be if there was anything in it. The only things in it are a family history, a list of allergies and medical conditions, and a couple of injuries that he obtained in college. Everything else McKay had sealed. You can only imagine his reaction when I asked about it." At the last comment, both men allowed themselves a small smile. They were both familiar with how Rodney reacted to situations that he found to be private.

Looking over the file briefly, mostly at the family history, Sheppard's eye froze over a date. It only took a moment to for him to figure out the ages in his head. "Shit"

"What is it, Colonel?"

"What day did mini-Rodney say it was?" He had to be sure before he said anything, but when the doctor told him, his heart sank. "I think I know why our little Rodney reacted the way he did when you made that comment about his mother." Passing the file, he pointed to a date. "According to the Rodney in there, his mother died two week ago."

"Oh Heavens, this day just gets worse and worse."

--TBC--


	3. Slow Progress

Disclaimer: I do not own any aspect of Stargate: Atlantis, nor will I ever own any... I can only dream.

I'd like to start off by giving a BIG THANKS to Satio for being my beta! You're the greatest!

AN: Hooray for Reviews! I love reading them. Things are going to start to pick up more in the next chapter, so I hope you all stick around! And I apologize if the accents are wrong, I tried.

So Please Enjoy and Review.

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"Tell me that you can fix this," John wasted no time as he barged into the science labs. After talking with Carson, he felt powerless to do anything for his teammate. If there was one thing that John hated, it was being helpless.

Zelenka looked up from his computer with a frown. "Things are moving slowly, but they are moving Colonel."

Looking around the lab, he could see that everyone was busy with one thing or another. Somehow it didn't seem enough; Rodney deserved more. The scared, helpless boy sleeping in the infirmary deserved so much more. That knowledge churned in the Colonel's stomach, but he knew that it wasn't anyone's fault, at least not anyone in this room. "Fine, tell me what happened."

Zelenka stood up and looked at the Colonel uncomfortably. "We were looking at an artifact that we found on P433X9." He pointed to the object on the other side of the room. It looked like a smaller version of the monoliths one would expect to find in Egypt; only this one was about 3 feet high and made of some type of metal. A first Sheppard thought the metal was just regular steel. However as he made his way deeper into the room, strangle cravings would appear at certain angles. "Rodney found the power source was depleted, asked me to hook it to a generator. That was when the bad thing happened." Zelenka could see the desperation in the Colonel's eyes and understood it. "It's only recently we've been able to find the purpose of the device."

"Which is?"

"It was created as a way to cheat death."

"What!" Sheppard whipped his head around to look at the seemingly harmless device. That shining monolith was cause of all this trouble.

"Yes, I can understand your surprise. But the device is flawed. It was meant to revert the aging process maybe even reverse the effects of the Wraith by making the user younger however in the processes it also relapses the memory as well."

"Can it be reversed?" Sheppard almost cringed when Zelenka sighed.

"From what we can tell, the civilization was culled before a solution was found." Zelenka removed his glasses and rubbed his face with his hands. He had been hunched over the computer for the last six hours trying to figure out a way to help his friend.

"Damn it," Sheppard slammed his fist against the table next to him causing a lab tech to jump.

"We are working out a solution, Colonel. If there is a way to fix Rodney, we will find it."

Looking at Zelenka, he knew that it was true. He suddenly started to feel the tiredness in his muscles. He had been running on full stream and the day was finally catching up with him. "I know you will. Today just hasn't been going well."

"Is Rodney okay?"

"He's…" Sheppard paused for a moment, not knowing what to say. "Well that is… as well as can be expected, considering."

"So you know about his father, do you?" John stared at the scientist in front of him.

"Excuse me?" Instead of answering Zelenka stood up and motioned for Sheppard to follow him into what appeared to be an office. When the door closed behind him, Zelenka replied.

"I am close to Rodney, and I am sure you know about my distiller." John nodded. "The week after the Wraith attacked Atlantis, McKay and I celebrated. By the end of the night, he became very inebriated. When I took him to his room, he seemed to forget where and when he was for a moment. After some talking, I learned of his 'unhappy' upbringing."

At first Sheppard didn't respond- he was absorbing everything that was being said. His first response was to be angry with the Czech due to the fact that he knew something so important about Rodney something that Sheppard himself knew nothing about. But he knew that it wasn't Zelenka's fault. "How long will it take you?"

"Honestly? I do not know Anywhere from a week to a month. Don't worry Colonel, we will find solution."

"I'm not concerned so much about you guys."

"I know." Putting a hand on the tired soldier's arm, Zelenka guided Sheppard out of the office. "Maybe we get lucky. Find a solution tonight. It's still early, only nine o'clock." Both men smiled, "you should get some rest Colonel. You don't look so good."

"Thanks, it's been a long day." When he reached the doorway, he turned and wished the scientists luck before leaving.

Running over the events of the day on his way to the room, Sheppard didn't notice Ronon until he almost ran into him. "Hey big guy, you should give a man some warning."

"You should watch where you're going, Sheppard." John searched for a response, but words seemed to be eluding him at the moment. "Teyla told me that McKay's been turned into a kid."

"Yeah, he has."

The Satedan grinned and laughed slightly. "This I got to see." He was about to leave when Sheppard grabbed his arm.

"Hey listen, Ronon. Rodney doesn't remember any of us, or any of this for that matter." He gestured at their surroundings, "he's a little worse for wear so if you're going to see him… be gentle, okay?"

"Is that an order?"

"Yes, that's an order."

Ronon could hear the strain in the man's voice and decided not to push the matter any further. "Okay then."

"Thanks." Heaving a sigh, John started down the corridor again. "Now if you don't mind, it's been a long day and I'm going to try and forget all this happened, and get some sleep." Ronon watched as Sheppard turned the corner before he headed towards the infirmary.

It was almost midnight and Carson sat at his desk going over the inventory for the next shipment of medical supplies. It wasn't very interesting but the last time he let someone else take care of it, they ended up with three hundred boxes of gloves but only enough aspirin to last them a week. It had been a mistake but Carson didn't want to take anymore chances. The doctor took a deep breath and leaned back onto his chair. Looking at his watch, he figured that he should check on the little tyke in the next room.

At first glance, it seemed as though Rodney hadn't moved at all since he fell asleep and seemed to be sleeping peacefully. However; Carson noticed that the blanket he had placed over the boy was strewn across the floor, and that he was breathing to quick for a peaceful rest. Picking up the blanket, Carson was about to placed the blanket back over his now smaller friend, when Rodney started to mutter and stir slightly. Moments later, Rodney started to toss in his sleep and his unintelligible mumbling grew louder. He was having a nightmare.

Sitting on the edge of the bed, Carson slowly and gently shook his shoulders. "It's alright lad, you're just havin a bad dream." Rodney woke with a start, knocking the doctor's hand away and scanned the room for someone or something that didn't seem to be there. Carson held up his hands to show that he meant no harm. "You were having a nightmare You're safe now."

Rodney looked wearily at the doctor for a moment. It was only when he looked to his right at the other beds that he relaxed. "Sorry, Dr. Beckett," he stated, staring down at the blanket. Carson laughed softly and McKay looked up confused.

"You've nothing to apologize for Rodney."

"Oh… well, it's just…," Rodney trailed off, still avoiding looking at the doctor.

Carson allowed himself a small smile at how his friend was acting It was endearing and saddening at the same time. "If anyone should be apologizing it should be me." It was this that got Rodney to look up at the doctor. "The comment I made about your mother was out of line, and I'm sorry. Do ya think ya can forgive me?" Rodney just stared at Carson in disbelief. Whatever he had been expecting him to say or do, this was not it. "What do ya say lad? Can we start over?"

Rodney smiled slightly for what seemed to be the first time since the accident, whatever fears he had towards the doctor had faded. "Okay." Rodney extended his hand towards the doctor. "It's nice to meet you. I'm Rodney McKay."

"Lovely to meet ya, Rodney, I'm Dr. Beckett." Rodney's smile grew a bit more and his body language was lax and calm. He looked around at his surrounding for a moment, catching Carson's attention. "How do you like your accommodations?"

"They're pretty strange actually, but I like them."

"Really Usually kids are terrified of hospital rooms and doctors."

"I'M NOT A KID," the suddenly outburst startle Carson and even Rodney a little. "I don't mind hospitals all that much. And I actually really like doctors. There's this one at the local hospital who's really nice. He doesn't talk down to me like the other doctors. He knows that I'm really smart and that I understand more than other kids my age. He gives me candy every time go there, for my sister, but there's always two of everything." Rodney was almost whispering by the time he finished talking. His shoulders were hunched forward and he seemed tired, almost disheartened.

"Aye, I understand Rodney." Looking at the hunched shoulders of his friend in front of him, Carson wanted to comfort him. No, he needed to comfort him. Very slowly, Carson reached up and affectionately patted the boy's head. Rodney stiffened at first, but soon relaxed and let himself lean forward into the doctor that was sitting on bed. Carson left his hand on the back of Rodney's neck, squeezing it gently to try and offer comfort.

"This isn't a hallucination, is it?"

"Nay, it's real," he responded and smiled when he felt the boy sigh against him.

"Why do all of the worst things have to happen to me? This would be so much better if it wasn't real."

"Well, I could give you a head CT if you really wanted to rule out any brain trauma." There was a long pause and he wondered if he had said the wrong thing. Then he heard McKay laugh slightly The doctor let out a breath he didn't realize he was holding.

"That's ok," Rodney started, but then he stopped. He straightened up and looked at the doctor, curiosity filling he eyes when he realized something. "I'm an astrophysicist?"

"That you are. You're one of the greatest, if not the best." Rodney smiled softly at the last comment, but he seemed disappointed. "What did you think you'd grow up to be?"

"A pianist, I've been taking lessons, but I'm not as good as my mother," Rodney paused before he added, "was. She was so happy when I told her…"

"Well, I can say that your mother would be proud of you, if she could see what are great man you've become." Carson hoped that this fact would make Rodney happy, but Rodney just scoffed at it.

"Proud, huh?" Carson looked as Rodney slowly started to regress.

"Yes, Rodney, she'd be very proud." But it didn't seem like the boy was listening anymore. His eyes seemed to have dimmed and stared at nothing.

"I don't think she'd be proud after what happened." Even sitting next to the boy, Carson had to lean forward to hear what was said.

"Mother's are mysterious creatures Rodney. They'll forgive the greatest of mistakes, no matter how terrible, when her children are involved." Seeing the tiredness in the boy's face and body language, Carson stood up and put the blanket over Rodney when he laid down.

Before closing his eyes to sleep, he looked up at Carson his eyes full of a pain that lurked just under the surface. It almost seemed as though he was going to ask something, but he just stared. Rodney wanted Dr. Beckett to be right, desperately. He had always trusted doctors- they were smart and knew lots of stuff about lots of things. "Are you sure?"

"Aye, I'm sure. Now I think it's time that you get some rest It's late." Carson waited for Rodney's eyes to close before hitting the light switch next to the bed. The infirmary was darkened, but not completely. He didn't want Rodney to panic if he woke up again in the night. Carson stopped on the way to the door, wondering if maybe he should just stay the night to look over the boy.

"You should get some sleep doc." Beckett nearly jumped out of his skin. How he missed Ronon, who was sitting three beds away from where he had been just with Rodney, he would never know.

"Bloody hell, Ronon, you nearly gave me a heart attack."

"Sorry." Carson couldn't help but smile at the man's briefness but got curious when Ronon didn't move from the bed.

"Well, if you're here to see Rodney, you've come too late. I'm not allowing anymore visitors for the night."

"I've already talked with him."

Carson stared at the large man in front of him wondering when he had been able to talk with Rodney. It was at that moment that he realized how settled in the man seemed to be. "How long have you been there?"

"Not too long," Carson knew that meant anywhere from five minutes to five hours.

"Well you shouldn't concern yourself about my sleeping habits. Someone has to stay with the wee one over there, and as great as my nursing staff maybe, I would rather it be someone Rodney was more comfortable with"

"I'll stay."

"Excuse me?"

"I came in earlier, to see if the rumors where true You were in your office talking to a nurse. I talked with McKay for a bit." Ronon stopped thinking that the explanation should have sufficed but from the look on the doctor's face, he realized that more information was needed. "He was pretending to be asleep when I came in. When I called him on it, he said that I was just an illusion of 'a battered mind', whatever that means. When he saw my gun he said, 'Even if you're not real, you might as well be useful.' So I agreed to watch over him while he slept."

The only thing Carson could do was stare at the man in front of him. Then he remembered how Rodney had relaxed a bit when he had looked over at what the doctor had thought were empty beds. "Well then, I guess that takes care of that. I shall see you in the morning." Ronon nodded and looked over to his sleeping teammate. Still eyeing Ronon, Carson started to leave.

He wondered if Rodney would be surprised to learn that so many people were worried about him. When he reached his room, Carson activated his radio before taking it off. Once he got hold of Elizabeth, he requested that she ask SGC for Rodney's unabridged medical file during the next transmission with Earth. If there was any hope of helping his friend, Carson he needed to know everything.


	4. A Calm Before a Storm

Disclaimer: not mine, nor will it ever be

AN: First off, I'd like to thank EVERYONE who has left a review! Thanks for sticking with me! I lost my Beta, so if anyone is interesting in helping me out...? It'd be greatly appreciated! Here is a revised version of the last chapter. I fixed up some grammar mistakes, no plot added or changed. Also, I've added chapter titles.

New chapter should be out in a couple of days.

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"So, you're my friend?" Rodney stared at the beautiful woman in front of him. For the last two days, he had been stuck in the infirmary for observation. Not that he minded it all too much because he really didn't know where else he could go. It was during these past couple of days that random people had come by to say hello and see how he was doing. It was a little over-whelming to say the least. At the moment a tanned skinned woman named Teyla, who had been by to visit many times before, was sitting next to the bed asking him to join her for lunch in the cafeteria.

"Yes Rodney, a good friend." Rodney didn't respond, he just kept looking at her. Turning the doctor, Telya asked, "I do not understand why he keeps asking me this question? I have been by many times to visit, is his memory somehow affected by what happened?"

Trying not to laugh, Carson responded, "I don't think that's it, luv." Carson could tell that the boy was quite taken with her. Telya turned her inquisitive glance back towards Rodney.

"A total gorgeous girl is my friend," he blurted out, deadpanned.

Telya blushed and looked at Carson who had to walk away for fear of laughing. She was taken back by the statement, not quite sure what to say; something that didn't happen to her often. "I am your friend," Telya started. "No matter how difficult you may find it to believe. Now, my offer stands, but only for a little while longer." After a moment, he bashfully accepted her offer.

As they headed towards the door, Rodney stopped suddenly and looked towards the doctor. He was about to ask for permission to go, when the doctor started to make a shooing motion with his hands. Carson told the boy, "run along lad, it's no good for a boy to be cooped up in one place for as long as you have." So with a big smile, Rodney took his first trip out of the infirmary.

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Although it was off hours, the mess still had a good amount of people in it. Soldiers and scientists were scattered throughout the dining area; among them were John Sheppard and Ronon Dex drinking what appeared to be coffee. They had been told by Teyla to wait, so they did.

"Look who decided to leave the infirmary," Ronon nodded toward the doorway behind Sheppard that revealed Teyla followed by a frightened looking Rodney. A smile came over his face as he saw them walk in. Rodney was dressed in clothes that were donated by the Athosians, since there was nothing in Atlantis that could fit him. The earth tones and leather seemed strange on the boy, but the clothes fit him well enough.

"Teyla, over here," Sheppard flagged them down. Telya walked right over with Rodney never to far behind. John had noticed that although Rodney knew that he wasn't in any danger, the boy still clung to people he had deemed to be 'safe' over the last two days. "So this is the surprise you where talking about. How are you doing Rodney?"

"I'm fine, Mr. Sheppard." Ronon nearly choked on his drink when he heard that, even Teyla couldn't help smiling a little at the formality.

"Rodney, I've told you before call me John," he gave Ronon a glare that could kill when he heard him start to laugh again before turning his attention back to Rodney. "Or Sheppard that's what everyone else does."

The boy nodded. When he turned his attention to Ronon to say something, the Satedan interjected, "Don't even try to call me Mr. Dex." The statement would have been more menacing if Ronon hadn't smiled afterward, but Rodney got the message.

"Well then, now that we got the niceties out of the way, who's hungry?" Sheppard asked.

"I am!" Everyone looked at Rodney who was just a little embarrassed by his outburst.

"You all heard the boy," making a grand gesture with his arms he pointed to the food. "Let's get some grub." As they made their way to the food line, Rodney stayed close. He could feel the eyes of the other people in the room. He tried not to let it bother him, but he couldn't help feeling nervous. Wasting no time, Ronon started to shovel food onto his plate. He was followed by Teyla, who chose her food a little more sensibly. John waited for Rodney to start, but was a little surprised that he just stood staring.

Sheppard kneeled down so he could talk more privately. "What's the matter, Rodney?" He watched as Rodney shifted his weight from one foot to another, looking down uncomfortably.

"This is just kind of weird. I'm not used to… to all this…" Rodney couldn't quite translate his feeling in words properly. These people were so willing to except him and treated him with a familiarity that he wasn't used to. When he looked at Sheppard, he had that same kind smile on his face that shined with understanding and patience.

"Don't worry, Rodney, nothing bad is gonna happen." Putting his hand on Rodney's shoulder he added, "We're all friends."

"I'm starting to get that a bit, but…" he started sheepishly. Over the last couple of days he tried to come to terms with the fact that to them, he wasn't nine years old and that he had lived the last two years with these people.

"But?"

"I don't have any money for food." Sheppard had to stop himself from smiling to spare his friend's feelings. He kept forgetting how out of place Rodney was.

"Listen to me, Rodney. Everything is free, okay? Not just in the infirmary." He waited until the boy nodded before continuing. "And even if it wasn't, considering how many times you've saved this city and everyone in it, I don't think you'd have to pay anyway."

Rodney's face light up at that last part, "Really?"

"Yes, really, now get some food and we'll tell you all about it." He gently pushed him forward. Pausing of a motion, he realized that this was the first time that he had touched Rodney, without him flinching or tensing up.

When they got back to the table, everyone regaled Rodney with tales of their mission's at Atlantis. Eating slowly, he listened and absorbed everything that was being said. His teammates couldn't help but feel odd at how they were telling Rodney all this. But nothing had been quite since the accident. Their team was down a science officer, so they were basically grounded. That was, unless they wanted to bring Kavanaugh along with them.

"I get to use a gun, fight aliens, and go to different planets. That's the coolest job ever! How many planets have I been too? Have I ever been shot?" The question kept coming from, while they ate their food. Mostly Sheppard and Telya answered his questions, but every once in a while Ronon would put his two cents in. Rodney started to ask something and then stopped halfway through. Confusion covered his face as he asked a different question. "What about Ford?"

The table grew quiet at that question; no one had mentioned the missing team member. "You remember Ford?" Ronon was the one to ask.

"I… I don't know." He looked around with a confused and almost pained expression on his face. "The name just popped into my head." Seeing the looks on the adults' faces was a little unnerving. "Did I say something wrong?"

"No, no of course not Rodney," Sheppard looked at the other people at the table for support, but they were as dumbfounded as he was. "It's just… kind of weird that you mentioned Ford. He was apart of our original team, but he sort of went AWOL." He stopped there, unsure of how much he should tell. Rodney looked down at his plate, lost in his thoughts.

The next minute was filled with an awkward silence that seemed to affect everyone but Ronon, who after the initial shock, just continued to eat. It was Teyla who broke the silence this time. "So tell me about where you grew up Rodney? I am interesting in hearing about what type of childhood that creates such a genius." She was laying on the charm pretty heavily, trying to ease Rodney's confusion.

John was about to interrupt, when Rodney answered her. "It's nothing to special. We live in a small neighborhood, not to far from the city where I take my piano lessons and Jeanie goes to ballet. She's really good at it; even the teacher says that Jeanie's her best student. My lesson usually gets out first and sometimes I get to watch her on stage. It's one of the best parts of my day, watching how she glides across the stage. My mom always used to say how lucky she was to have such great children, one that was beautiful watch and the other one who's wonderful to listen to. She was the one who insisted that we go to the lessons, since dad thought they were a waste of time."

"Your mother sounds like a very wise woman."

John stiffened a bit at the mention of Rodney's mother and the boy winced slightly at the comment, but slowly smiled to himself. "She was really smart and nice too, kinda like you Telya."

Telya gave Rodney a pleased smile. "Thank you for the compliment Rodney. Maybe one day in the future I could meet you mother."

Sheppard decided that now was the time to interrupt and stated, a little too loudly and a little to fast, "how'd you like to see where you work, Rodney!" Telya, Ronon, and a few other people startled by the outburst stared at the Colonel. He just gave Teyla a quick, stern 'I'll talk to you later' look before getting up and turning back to Rodney.

"Sure," he responded, giving Sheppard a small grateful smile. Giving everyone a quick goodbye, Rodney eagerly followed the Colonel out into the hall towards the labs.

center /center

"Thanks for what you did back there." Rodney didn't look at up when he talked to Sheppard. He just kept walking forward, eyes slightly downcast.

"No problem Rodney." John looked down and could see that the boy wanted to say something, but couldn't quite let it out. He stopped and grabbed his shoulder gently to turn Rodney towards him. "What is it, Rodney?"

He tried to look anywhere but at the man in front of him. "You know that she's dead, don't you?"

He paused for a moment before answering, "Yea, I do." Rodney tensed with an emotion that Sheppard couldn't quite identify. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"No." John reached out to Rodney, but the boy started to walk again leaving the Colonel behind. "Hey, wait up! You don't know where you're going."

center /center

"So you finally decided to visit." Radek greeted the two visitors with open arms. Patting Sheppard on the arm, he smiled greatly. "You'll be happy to know, Colonel, that we make much progress."

Smiling back at the man, Sheppard looked towards Rodney who still stood between Sheppard and the doorway. "Did you hear that, Rodney? Zelenka's got everything under control without your help."

"That's good, I guess." Rodney looked up at the two men nervously. "Keep up the good work?" He added awkwardly, not knowing what to say. Both men stared a moment, the boy's out of character behavior, for the adult McKay at least, was a little hard to get used to.

"AH, praise from the great McKay. Everyone cherish this moment!" Zelenka shouted to the rest of the staff in the room. Sometime during this exchange Miko had walked up to greet them. Instinctively, Rodney took a step closer to Sheppard.

"Welcome back, McKay. It's good to see you're doing well." She smiled warmly at him and extended out her hand. Realizing that she meant no harm, he shook the woman's hand.

"You can call me Rodney. It's a little weird when people call me by my last name." This seemed to delight the scientist and her smile grew.

"Alright then, Rodney, you probably don't remember me, but I'm one of your assistants, Miko." She looked towards Sheppard after the introductions and asked if she could show Rodney around.

"What do you say?" Sheppard asked as he looked at the boy. Rodney didn't answer, he just nodded slowly. Before Sheppard could say another word, Miko whisked Rodney into the labs.

The Colonel watched as Rodney explored the lab. Watching his interactions, he could tell that the female scientists, especially Miko, had all taken an instant liking to the miniature version of the adult tyrant. It was then that Sheppard realized that McKay always had that quality about him, only he was a little rougher around the edges as an adult. McKay would seem to be an arrogant, selfish control freak, but if you spent any time with the man you'd learn the truth. It had taken only a matter of days before Sheppard became friends with the scientist. Not just friends but something more, because over the years John had learned that he could put his life in Rodney's hands and the man would everything he could to not disappoint him.

"Did you hear me, Colonel?" Sheppard snapped out of thoughts by the Czech's questions.

"No, sorry, I was just thinking about something. What did you say?"

Zelenka shook his head as he repeated himself to the Colonel, "I said I found out what caused McKay's accident." When he saw that he had the other man's full attention, he continued. "McKay had been touching the artifact when I restored the power. We should have been more careful. We are now able to work on device without fear of…" Zelenka searched for the right word.

"Repercussions," Sheppard added.

"Yes, repercussions. We are working on way to reverse process, but it will take time." Zelenka took off his glasses and rubbed his eye, the long hours were getting to him.

Sheppard looked around and smiled, giving the Czech a big pat on the back. "I know you guys will figure something out. You're the best and the brightest, that's why you're h…" He was cut off by a commotion in the back of the lab. Looking at each other briefly, they knew it had to involve Rodney and went to see what happened.

What they found was an irate Kavanaugh and a distraught Miko trying to calm him down. As soon as they arrived, Rodney ran behind Sheppard grabbing his hand for support. Kavanaugh pointed to the boy. "He's faking it! The guy turns himself into a kid and pretends not to know anything, so we have to fix his mess."

Sheppard took a step toward the man and asked a little hostilely, "What are you talking about Kavanaugh?"

Kavanaugh responded by pointing to the white board behind him, all the while glaring at the boy hiding behind Sheppard. "Look at this." Sheppard looked that the board. It was filled with diagrams and notes. The only thing that stood out was a completed equation that took up most of the board.

"I think I'm missing sometime here."

"I had been working on this equation for last hour and when I walk away from the board for one second; McKay waltzes on over and completes it! The bastards been lying this whole time to get..." As Kavanaugh shouted, Sheppard could feel Rodney's grip tighten.

"Watch it, Kavanaugh!" Sheppard never liked the man standing in front of him. It took all his energy to not hit him at the moment. "Despite what you may think, Rodney doesn't remember anything. If you don't believe me, ask Carson."

Looking as smug as ever he retorted, "then how do you explain this?" Again he pointed at the board.

"How about we ask and find out?" By now the entire staff was paying attention to what was happening. Sheppard just hoped that Rodney didn't freeze up. Turning around to the scared boy, he sat back on his haunches and tried to look as reassuring as possible. "Rodney, how did you know the answer?"

Keeping his eyes on the floor, Rodney spoke softly. "I don't know." As he continued, he voice slowly got louder. "I saw him trying to fix the equation, when Miko was showing me around. When he walked away I knew that something was off and then it just clicked. So I fixed it. I told him when he came back but I didn't know that he was going to get so mad. I wouldn't have done it otherwise. I'm sorry, really I am." Sheppard could see that the boy was about to go into full McKay rant mode, so he cut him off.

"It's okay, Rodney. You didn't do anything wrong." He turned to stare angrily at Kavanaugh before he went on. "Kavanaugh is just having a bad day right?" Seeing that everyone was taking McKay's side, Kavanaugh stormed passed them, muttering under his breath.

Rodney flinched when the scientist brushed by him. Sheppard looked up to Zelenka and shared a knowing look. Zelenka could see the distress in his friend's body language and tried to cheer him up the only way he knew how; by stroking his ego "No matter how old McKay is, he always has to be best. Especially when if comes to showing up Kavanaugh." Patting the boys shoulder, he said, "good job, Rodney!" The rest of the praise was spoken in a language that no one else understood. However they all knew what he meant, even Rodney.

He lit up a bit with the praise and the smiles that he got from Zelenka and the other people in the lab. "My sister always says that I'm the smartest," he responded quietly.

"Well, you might be the smartest, but I'm still a little worried about how you knew that answer and how you remembered Ford. I think we should head back to the doc's place and get you checked out." Zelenka nodded in agreement.

"Okay. It was nice seeing you again, Dr. Zelenka." Rodney waved bye to the rest of the staff and waited for the Colonel to say his goodbyes. Once they were out of the room and in the empty hall, Sheppard could see some of the tension leave the boy's body, some of it, but not all it.

"Don't worry, Rodney." Sheppard reached down and ruffled his hair a bit. "I'm sure that Dr. Beckett will be able to figure this all out." As he said this, Jphn wasn't sure if it was for Rodney's benefit or his own.

center /center

Rodney and Sheppard sat on the bed with Carson standing in front of him. He was putting up two scans of Rodney's brain on the light-up board. "This one is Rodney's most recent scan from before the accident, and this one is from yesterday." The two on the bed looked at the scans, not sure of what they should be seeing. Beckett continued. "As you can probably see, both scans are practically identical. Meaning that nothing has really changed since the accident, except for this region right here on little Rodney's scan. As you might have guessed,this is the area of the brain that our memories are stored."

"So what does all this mean?"

"It means, Colonel, that all of Rodney's memories are still enacted, however something is preventing him from remembering them." Carson looked at Rodney to see how he was taking the news since he hadn't spoken. The boy just stared at the scans, not letting any emotion show. "I'd like to do another scan to be sure, but I believe that either whatever is suppressing you memories may be reversing itself or it just might not have done the job completely. But from what you've told me, I can only guess that with time you may start to remember more and more of your adult life." They waited for Rodney to react, but he only nodded his head. At that moment, a man in uniform walked in the infirmary with some documents looking at Dr. Beckett. "If you'd excuse me a moment lads," Carson turned off the board and greeted the man.

It wasn't until Carson was gone that Rodney spoke. "It kind of makes sense now."

Sheppard changed positions on the bed so that he could talk better with Rodney. "What does?"

"When I first meet…" Rodney stopped for a moment and rephrased the sentence. "After the accident, when you came and got me, I felt safer. It's the same with Teyla and Ronon, but not as much." Sheppard stared at him a little shocked by the information. Rodney kept staring at his legs that were hanging over the bed. "I was going to run out of the lab before you got there, but when I saw you something stopped me. Somehow I knew I could trust you, even if I was still scared."

"Rodney, I'm…"

"You don't have to say anything. I just figured saying it out loud would make me feel a little better. I'm not good with people, with dad I always…" He paused and looked at John. "If I have a friend like you who I can trust, then I know that I didn't grow up to be like my father, and that makes me happy." He gave the Colonel a heartbreaking smiling.

Sheppard looked at Rodney, not sure of how to respond. "Don't worry Rodney; you turned out to be a great guy."

---TBC---


	5. Pieces of the Truth

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters... except maybe McKay's father... but that's nothing to be happy about.

AN: Hey guys! Sorry about the late update... again. I reuploaded the last chapter, fixing some of the little mistakes that I had missed: nothing changed to the story. I lost my beta... she disappeared on me after spring break. So if someone would like to help me out andfill in the position PM me or email me. I'd really appricated it. I'm also beginning to see that my hope for weekly updates has been crushed by my college schedule. Thankfully, I only have three more papers, a group project, and finals left. T-T I don't like school anymore. Luckily for you though, the next chapter is abouthalfway done. This is due to the fact that when I started writing this chapter I included somethings thatI shouldn't have and had to start over. p

Thanks for all the great reviews! I've taken somethings into consideration and I hope you enjoy this chapter and the ones to come! Enjoy and please review!

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Carson stood in his office holding a thick folder in his hands. On the front in big red letters was the word CONFIDENTAL. He didn't need to look at the tab to know that McKay's name was on it. Taking a quick look to make sure that Sheppard and Rodney were settled in the next room, he sat at his desk and slowly opened the folder. The doctor's heart sank with every page he turned, reports of mishaps and accidents filled each page. However, each incident was written off as a typical childhood accident or a fight that Rodney had gotten into with kids his age. Looking more closely, Carson noticed that every time an injury required an overnight stay, it was at a different hospital. "Clever bastard," he whispered under his breath, knowing that his father had done this to avoid suspicion. 

Carson closed the filed, feeling sick to his stomach. He felt guilty about having pried into Rodney's past. As open as he was about how he felt and what he thought, Rodney was a private man when it came to his past. He had mastered the art of evading questions that he had no intention of answering, and now because of a freak accident everything had slipped out into the open. Carson laughed softly as he thought of the fit that would follow when Rodney returned to normal. The smile quickly faded as he looked down at the file. He knew that this time, things wouldn't be so easy to fix.

A knock on the door pulled Carson from his thoughts. He looked up to see Sheppard leaning against the doorframe. "Is that what I think it is?" The Colonel asked.

"Aye, it is." He let out a sigh as he got up from his desk. "God, John, this is worse that we thought. I'm afraid that if little Rodney over there continues to regain his memories, we might have a big problem on our hands. But even if Zelenka is able to fit him before that happens, McKay is going to be very angry with us.Looking atsome of the things in that file, I'm surprised that Rodney's as well adjusted as he is as an adult."

"Do you think that-" Sheppard was cut off by a voice over their headsets.

"Dr. Beckett, this is the Gate Room. Do you copy?"

Carson gave Sheppard a worried look before responding, "Aye, Beckett here."

"SGA-3 and 5 had an accident off-world. We need you and all available staff here ASAP."

"I'm on my way." Carson was already out of his office, ordering his staff to grab the emergency packs and head to the Gate Room. He handed a bag to Sheppard and quickly turned to Rodney. "Rodney, I need you to stay put for a bit." Rodney stared that the two men with confusion. The doctor waited till he saw the boy nod, before turning back to Sheppard. "Let's go, Colonel."

"We'll be back in no time, Rodney." Sheppard said on his way out the door.

Rodney looked about the infirmary, only a few nurses remained. They were busy preparing for the patients that were bound to be arriving soon. He knew that he should listen to Dr. Beckett, but something inside of him was compelling him to find out what was wrong. He felt worried for the people that the doctor was going to help, people that he didn't know. As soon as he thought that, he realized his mistake. He did know those people, even if he couldn't remember them. Rodney took another quick look around before stealing out of the room after Sheppard and Beckett.

The gate room was filled with movement and shouted orders by the time Rodney reached it. The two off-world teams had been exploring an abandoned mineshaft, looking for any indication of what had once been there. When a small tremor hit the area, several membersbecame trapped in the caves. Due to atmospheric interference, the teams were unable to contact Atlantis and had been forced to find ways to get their team members out of the mines. In all, there were five severely wounded people and a few others with minor injuries. At the moment, Carson and his staff were doing their best to get everyone the help that they needed as soon as possible. Rodney stared at the scene in front of him, unsure of what to do. He could see Dr. Beckett hovering over an unconscious man and Sheppard helping a nurse to bandage another patient; while some were already being taken to the infirmary.

Rodney was contemplating just leaving so that he wouldn't get in anyone's way, when he saw the face of one of the female soliders. His heart sank for reasons he wasn't sure about, he didn't even realized that he had moved until he was kneeling besides her. The solider had a pained smile on her face as she looked at Rodney. He could see that she was in bad shape from that gash on the side of her face and the blood that was coming from a wound on her side.

The nurse looked up at Rodney shocked to see the boy. "What are you doing here Rodney?" She almost shouted. "Dr. Beckett told you to stay in the infirmary."

"It's okay." The solider interrupted. "Let him stay, please. Let it be a last request, huh?" The solider tried to joke. Yet from the look on the nurse's face, Rodney knew that the situation was serious. "Long time, no see huh, McKay," the words were meant to be light, but he could hear the pain in her voice.

Something suddenly clicked in Rodney's mind, "Cadman?" He asked softly, moving closer.

Cadman's laugh was quickly followed by a coughing, as the nurse reached into her kit. The nurse stopped suddenly and looked at Rodney for a moment. Unexpectedly she grabbed his arm and put his hands on Cadman's chest at the base of her ribcage, right over the blood soaked pressure dressing. "Listen to me Rodney; if you're going to stay here, I'm going to need your help. I want you to keep pressure on this, okay? Can you do this for me, Rodney?" Rodney paled slightly, but nodded quickly. "I need to control the bleeding a bit more before we can move her." He could feel his hands almost instantly becoming covered with blood. He watched Cadman's face closely to see if he was causing her any pain.

"Why is it that you're always around me at my worst, McKay?" Cadman tried to suppress a groan as the pain from her wound steadily increased.

"It's not that bad." He stated, half watching what the nurse was doing.

"A cave fell on me, McKay." Her tone drew back his attention to her. "I think that this can qualify for bad."

"You're going to be fine." He stared at her intently, only to meet an equally intent stare.

"So now you're an optimist, huh?" She teased. "I think I've seen every side of you that there is now." Rodney gave her a puzzled looked before the nurse pulled his attention away by handing him clean pressure dressings. It was about this time that Sheppard had finished helping the other nurse and notice Rodney at Cadman's side. He looked around to make sure that he wasn't needed before making his way to Rodney.

They didn't see the Colonel until he spoke, "What are you doing here Rodney?" His voice was clipped, it was the voice that he usually reserved for situations that were about to turn for the worse or when McKay was about to do something he really shouldn't.

Rodney looked up, but before he could think of something to say Cadman let out a gasp of pain causing everyone's attention to turn back to their wounded friend. "This is one hell of a way to go." She moaned between the waves a pain that shot out from her chest. Sheppard knelt down next to them both, Rodney responded before he could say anything.

"You're not going to die." Sheppard was surprised with the conviction that he heard in Rodney's voice.

"That's sweet." Cadman painstakingly reached a hand to put it on top of his. "But it's not nice to lie."

"I'm not." Rodney never took his eyes from Cadman. She gently squeezed his hand, wearing a sad smile.

"You sound pretty sure. But I hate to be the one to say this, but you can't know everything McKay."

Rodney leaned forward gently, trying not to jar her wound. Sheppard could see that his facial expression had changed. The only way he could describe it was that for the first time Rodney truly looked like his older self. He whispered to her, "I know you Cadman. You're too stubborn to die."

"He's right, Cadman. You're going to be fine." Sheppard tried to reassure her, but she didn't hear him. She was looking at Rodney intently, like she was trying to figure him out. Shakily, she reached up the hand that she had placed on Rodney's.

Cadman gently caressed his cheek, "I could almost believe you." As her hand dropped, she left a streak of blood across his cheek. Cadman's whole body seemed to cringe in pain, before her eyes closed. Rodney kept his hands on the wound as the nurse shouted for a gurney. Sheppard had to pull Rodney away so that they could lift Cadman up and rush her out of the room. He didn't take his eyes off of her for a moment.

"She just passed out from the pain, she'll be fine." The nurse reassured them. "Carson's a great surgeon."

As she walked away, Rodney was dead weight in the Colonel's arms. "Rodney lets go." Sheppard nudged him forward slowly towards the infirmary. After a moment, when he was sure that Rodney could walk on his own, Sheppard released his hold on him. The boy was walking in a dazed, seeming not tonotice that he had Cadman's blood on him. Sheppard let him be until he saw the boy take a wrong turn. "Rodney, the infirmary is this way."

He stopped and looked over his shoulder at Sheppard, his eyes were wet. "I'm going to my room." Rodney started walking again.

"Rodney," Sheppard called out.

"They'll be busy, and I'll just be the way. So it best if I just go to my quarters." Rodney kept walking as he talked to Sheppard. "It's weird, I sort of remember Cadman. I remember her voice more than anything."

"Yeah, well you guys had a lot of time to talk a little while back." Sheppard noticed that Rodney had stopped in front of his own door but didn't open it. He had reached out to the door crystals but stopped when he saw the blood. Using his gene, Sheppard opened the door and guided Rodney inside.

"Let's get you cleaned up alright." Sheppard went ahead into the bathroom, while Rodney stood at the doorway looking around the room. John first washed the blood off of his own hands first before he turned on the Ancient's version of a shower. The water cascaded down from a spout high on the ceiling. He made sure that the temperature was fine before returning to Rodney.

He hadn't moved from where Sheppard had left him. He was staring at the room with a strange smile on his face. Sheppard suddenly realized that he'd never really seen Rodney's room before. Looking around he noticed that the room had only the bare essentials; it was spacious and very open. Which was strange since, after they reestablished connect with Earth, most people on Atlantis had found ways to bring over personal items and things to decorate their living spaces with.

"It's kind of bare, isn't it?" Rodney's voice was soft.

"Yea, I guess it is." Besides a desk and his bed there was no other real furniture except the metal cases holding science equipment.

"In a strange way, it makes a little sense," as Rodney spoke he would randomly look down at his hands, "that as an adult I would still hate small spaces. My dad would sometimes lock us in the closet, me more than Jeanie but I was fine with that. The room is more open this way." The matter-of-fact manner in which he spoke was a little unsettling. Sheppard remembered that the last thing that little Rodney remembered was being left in the closet; it was only now that he realized that that had happened before. Most likely, it had happened frequently.

"I'm surprised that you don't have any pictures of your sister." Sheppard mentally kicked himself as soon as the words left his lips. He had wanted to get him talking about happier things and had completely forgotten that the _adult Rodney_ had become estranged from his sister.

Rodney looked up at the only wall with frames on it. In those frames were diplomas and certificates, no personal pictures at all, aside from one picture of himself when he had graduate from college. He stared at the wall almost blankly, he didn't notice when Sheppard walked up to him and guided him towards the bathroom.

"The shower is set. I'll call Weir and tell her where you are," since Carson wouldtoo busy to disturb. Sheppard didn't say that last part, and hoped that Rodney wouldn't make the connection. Rodney shuffled slowly into the bathroom and closed the door. Sheppard took two steps and practically collapsed on Rodney's bed.

"Weir, this is Sheppard."

"Go ahead."

"I've got Rodney with me and I think that we're going to be staying in his quarters for the time being. If you could tell Carson later I'd really appreciate it."

"No problem John." She paused. "I saw Rodney leave the Gate Room with you. Is he okay?"

"He's a little shaken up, but he'll be fine."

"That's good to hear," Sheppard could hear someone speak in the background before she continued, "Once things quiet down I'll inform Carson."

"Thanks, Sheppard out." Once the conversation ended, he lay back onto the bed and tried to relax. Looking up at the clock next to the bed, he was surprised to see that it was already eleven o'clock. At least the day is almost over, he thought to himself before drifting off.

Unaware that he had fallen asleep, Sheppard was startled when he felt the mattress shift slightly. The lights were turned off, but he knew that it was Rodney curling up next to him; close but not touching. "Sorry, Rodney, I didn't mean to fall asleep."

"I think I hurt Jeanie." His voice was small and level. Sheppard moved his head to look down at Rodney. "You asked about the pictures."

"Oh, yea," Sheppard responded back just as quietly. He'd almost forgotten about the early question. "Why do you say that?"

"Whenever I think about her, I get this sinking feeling in my stomach. It's kind of like how I knew I could trust you. Instead of trust I feel bad about something, but I don't know why. I only really get pieces of my memories." Sheppard tried to think of a way to alleviate the boys fears but he was at a loss. He didn't really know anything about Jeanie, so for all he knew what Rodney was saying was true.

"You should get some sleep; it's been a long day." Sheppard sat up slowly and saw Rodney staring at him intently.

"Will you stay?" Rodney's voice was pleading. "I don't real-"

Sheppard cut him off, "sure Rodney." He knew all about how Ronan had taken to watching over Rodney in the infirmary at night. He was surprised to hear about it at first, but he could understand the Satedan's willingness to help the boy. As an out of place nine year old, Rodney had a certain vulnerability that made you want to do anything you could for him. Sheppard took off his boots and looked back at the bed, given Rodney's size there'd be enough room for the both of them.

Sheppard scooted up the bed and stretch out. Once they settled in, he waited until he could hear Rodney's breathing even out before he fell back asleep.

--TBC--


	6. Murphy's Law

Disclaimer: i do not own any of the character's, and sadly I never will... besides maybe McKay's father... and that doesn't make me happy T-T

AN: Gomen nasai! Watashi wa isogashikatta desu. (my japanese teacher would be soo proud!) I can not apologize enough for how late this chapter is! All I can say is that school and finals are over and done with! And finally work has given me a 'normal' schedule to work with, so things should be looking up! (i hope!) I also wanted to thank everyone who offered to help with the story (beta, etc.). Your support means the world to me, i don't think i can thank you enough! This chapter is dedicated to all of you!

So read and review everyone! tell me what you think, do you like how the story is turning out? i'm open to all types of comments and critisims!

I also wanted to give a BIG THANKS to AKAazosah, my new beta! I wouldn't have been able to get this out without your help! Thanks You!

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"So, how have ya been feeling?" Carson asked as he took the thermometer out of Rodney's mouth.

"Fine," he replied quickly, shifting slightly on the gurney.

"No aches or pains? Splinters?" Carson added the last part to get a rise out of the boy, butit didn't work.

"I'm fine." Rodney responded again pausing before he continued, this time a little annoyed. "I don't know why we have to do these daily check ups. I was fine yesterday and I'll be fine tomorrow. It's pointless." Carson was the one that didn't comment this time, but looked sternly at him. The doctor knew that something was wrong with his friend. Ever since the incident last week with Cadman, Rodney had become more difficult to talk with. 'I'm fine' had become a sort of mantra for him.

"We just want to make sure that the age reversal doesn't have any delayed effects." Carson watched as the boy shifted uncomfortably again, under his gaze.

"Nothing's wrong with me, Dr. Beckett. I'm fine." Rodney paused a moment and looked across the room. "Can I go say hi to Cadman now?"

Carson heaved a sigh before telling the boy to run along. He watched as Rodney made his way over to the bed across the infirmary. He saw that the boy's face brightened slightly when Cadman greeted him, but his body language remained that same: tense. He knew that Rodney was struggling with memories of a life that he hadn't lived yet. The Wraith alone were enough to give the boy nightmares. As the doctor walked back to his office, he saw that the Colonel was already there, waiting for him.

"Cadman's still here?" Sheppard inquired as Carson walked up his desk. "It's been a week."

"Aye, I'll be releasing her soon enough, Colonel, but as you already know, she had us all worried for the first couple of days." Carson made his way to his chair and eyed Sheppard for a moment. "Somehow I don't think that you came in here to ask about Laura."

Sheppard smiled at the doctor as he rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. He was about to answer when a knock on the door interrupted him. Both men looked up to see Zelenka in the doorway. "Excuse me. I came to pick up Rodney. We are almost finished with device. I know Rodney will throw fit if I didn't let him participate in some way."

"I'm sure Rodney would like that," Sheppard replied. Since the accident, he had become Rodney's guardian of sorts. Which he didn't mind at first, but sometimes it felt a little weird. "He's over with Cadman."

"Thank you, Colonel." Zelenka gave a quick nod to the two men before leaving. "Things will be normal soon, I promise." They shared a smile before Zelenka went to get Rodney.

Sheppard turned back to see the doctor still waiting for his response. Seeing how quickly the smile had faded from Carson's face, he knew that the doctor didn't quite share the Czech's optimism as well. "I'm worried about McKay." He stated directly to the point.

"I understand your concern. I guess I'm correct in assuming that you're talking about how he has become more withdrawn." The Colonel nodded. "Has he said anything to you?" Carson secretly hoped that Rodney was talking to someone.

"You know how he can be Doc. He's bottled up so tight, I'm afraid that he's just going to snap any day now. I'm sure you've noticed that he doesn't sleep in the infirmary anymore."

"Aye, I have," Carson commented a little sullenly. Ever since the off-world incident the week before, Rodney refused to stay the night in the infirmary. From what he had heard, Rodney would stay in John's room. Although he had heard that the lad would occasionally sleep in his own quarters under the watchful eye of the Colonel and sometimes Dex.

"He can't sleep without Ronon or me in the room to watch over him, like something's going to happen to him. He's been sleeping on my couch for Christ's sake. And don't even get me started on the nightmares. Just last night, he woke up thinking I was his father or God knows who, it took me an hour to calm him down" Sheppard rubbed his faced as he remembered the terrified look on Rodney's face when he woke up from whatever nightmare he had been having. Rodney started babbling about running and someone coming after him. He could hardly make out the words let alone understand what he talking about.

"He's remembering things, Carson." He continued. "He gets these far off looks sometimes, and I don't think he's remembering the good old times. Yesterday, on the way to the labs he asked why Gaul hadn't been around to see him yet and then clammed up… like he remembered what happened. Since then I haven't been able to get more then a few words out of him. Are you sure that there isn't anything we can do for him?"

"I wish there was something I could do, John. Honestly I really do. But like I told ya before, unless he starts talking to us, I'm afraid we can only be there for him. I explained to ya that the strain of these memories on the mind of a nine year old can could be quite traumatizing." Both men sat in silence after that. Carson had read through most of McKay's file and could only imagine what his friend was going though. Almost everyday, they had a similar conversation where John would ask a question that neither of them could answer.

Sheppard suddenly remembered something that he knew the doctor could answer. "What happened with his sister?"

John startled him with the urgency of the question. "Excuse me?"

"I guessing that large looking file is McKay's right?" Sheppard pointed to the only file on the desk that wasn't in a stack. Carson nodded. "The only thing that Rodney has told me about his memories is that he thinks he hurt Jeanie somehow. Is there any mention of an incident with his sister in there?"

Carson looked that the large file to his left on the desk. He hesitated before answering. "Aye, it does mention something." Carson sighed before continuing, "Everything in this file is confidential, Colonel, and ya bloody well know that." He gave the Colonel a stern look before continuing. "However, given the circumstances that we find ourselves in, I'm willing to make this one exception."

"I understand, Carson, than-"

"I'm only going to tell ya about what happen with Jeanie mind you. The rest ya can find out from McKay when he gets better." Carson nodded to the door;Sheppard took the hint andclosed it. "When Rodney was eleven, his sister called the police on their father and they were taken into the foster care system. From what I gathered in the file, Rodney had greater difficulties then his sister adjusting to their new environment. He fast tracked through school and didn't cause any problems besides the science project that I'm sure you're well aware of." Sheppard allowed himself a small smile as he rememberedwhen Rodney told him about the time he made a 'nonworking' model of a nuclear bomb.

"After that, things started to go downhill it seems," Beckett continued. "His file reported that he became more difficult to handle. When he was sixteen, there was an altercation reported with his sister."

"An altercation," Sheppard repeated, "What the hell does that mean?"

"I'm not sure, Colonel, there wasn't anything specific.The report mentioned that no parties involved wanted to investigate the incident or press charges. After that Rodney started college, leaving the foster system. Besides academically, he didn't make any waves. I don't believe he's really talked to his sister after the incident, from what I remember him telling me. A letter here and there maybe, but nothing of real substance."

Sheppard listened to every word that Carson told him, but his eyes were glued on the file in-between them. "Well, whatever happened, he's tearing himself up for it now."

A knock on the door halted the conversation. The door opened to reveal Nurse Hawkins, Carson smiled at her warmly. "Can I help ya, luv?" Sheppard didn't pay any attention to her beside a quick hello.

"Dr. Beckett I need your help. Cadman seems to think that she can check herself out."

"Bloody hell, I swear that woman is worse than you and Rodney." Carson looked at Sheppard with a mock glare. "Hell, I wouldn't be surprised if Rodney was the one who gave her the idea."

"You know that Rodney, always thinking." Sheppard offered weakly not moving from his seat as Carson got up. "I can wait." Carson paused a second, like he wanted to say something, before following the nurse out of his office.

Sheppard waited a good thirty seconds before thinking the door shut and opening Rodney's file. He quickly skimmed through the pages looking for any mention of Jeanie, or anything he could use to help his friend. He stopped however when he came to a picture that made his stomach turn. It was a picture of Rodney, a little older than he was at the moment. What made him sick was the state that Rodney was in. He had a black eye and a spilt lip. His eyes were downcast; Sheppard could see that he was broken. The writing on the bottom of the picture said 'Rodney McKay Age 11'. Attached to the picture, was a medical report, and a letter that was written by Rodney's social worker. He realized that this was why Jeanie had called the police. Better late than never, he thought cynically. Against his better judgment, he read the letter.

_Mr. and Mrs. Turner,_

_I wanted to thank you again for taking in Rodney and Jeanie at such short notice. I was hard pressed finding a couple that would take the two of them together, but I'm almost positive that you've seen the reason for it by now. _

_I only ask that you be patient with Rodney. From what I've been able to find out, after the unfortunate circumstances of his mother's death, he developed a deep attachment with his sister and a fear to get close with others. This may cause some troubles in the future, but I'm sure that with time he will grow up to do great things._

_I'll be coming by to visit next month and look forward to seeing the children._

_Ms. Fenton_

'Well that's more questions than answers,' Sheppard thought bitterly to himself. He was beginning tonotice that the death ofRodney's mother was a major factor in what has wrong with Rodney; and that Rodney was the only one who could shed any light on this situation. Flipping though the file again, he looked for the dates of any reports on September 27, 1977; the day that his mother died. Not finding anything, he was about to close the file when he found a medical report that was dated two days after her death. The report stated that Rodney was admitted for overnight observation due to head trauma he'd received in a fight. The thing that got him the most was the note at the bottom written by the attending physician. It simply stated that the patient's father requested that Rodney stay for an extra day.

Sheppard realized that he really needed to talk with Rodney. As he stepped out of Carson's office, he saw that the doctor was still talking with Cadman. Sheppard was sure that he wouldn't mind if he left without saying bye.

"Came to look over my shoulder again Colonel?" Zelenka asked good-humoredly as he saw Sheppard walk into the labs. Sheppard smiled as he made a beeline towards the scientist's station.

"Why should I? I'm sure little Rodney is all the motivation you need." Sheppard replied as he walked up to desk. "Where is the little guy?" He asked when he noticed that Rodney wasn't with the Czech. He couldn't help the feeling of panic that started to stir inside his gut.

Zelenka looked around the labs briefly, "Miko was showing him what everyone was working on. He should be around." He stopped looking when he noticed the tense stance of the Colonel and added, "Rodney is fine. What's the worst that could happen?"

Sheppard stared dumbfounded at the scientist. "You do remember how this whole thing started, right?"

"And we are fixing problem!" The Czech retorted. "Two days and Rodney is good as new. Tomorrow morning we start testing. This is good."

Sheppard relaxed a bit, "not so good for Carson's mice though." The two men shared a small laugh, both knowing just how serious the situation really was. Their banter was interrupted however, by a startled cry from across the room.

Everyone in the labs turned to see Rodney fall backwards and knock into the desk behind him. Kavanaugh was half turned towards Rodney; his elbow extended out behind him. No one moved at first. Sheppard and Zelenka were stunned, wondering if what they just saw really happened. Kavanaugh looked as startled as everyone else at first, but he quickly recovered. "I told you not to stand so close!" He shouted causing Rodney to flinch back and Sheppard to spring into action.

Sheppard was at Rodney's side in seconds. "You okay Rodney?" He asked quickly before turning his anger towards the source of his fury. "What the hell is your problem Kavanaugh!"

"It was an accident. He was hovering and I brushed him with my elbow." He responded. Sheppard wasn't listening though. He had turned to get a good look at his friend and he had to stop himself from jumping the scientist.

Blood was flowing freely from Rodney's nose as he sat on the floor, watching the two men interact with panic filled eyes. "I got in the way, it's my fault really. I should have known better."

Kavanaugh was about to say something in agreeance when Sheppard shot him a death glare. "If you keep talking, Kavanaugh, I swear you won't be walking out of this room." Kavanaugh huffed for a moment, but kept quiet. The Colonel quickly took control of the situation telling Zelenka to inform Beckett of what had happened and to take care of Kavanaugh.

"Let's go Rodney." Sheppard stood up and reached down to help Rodney up, but the boy didn't move. "Hey Rodney," he repeated. Rodney just looked up at him blankly. Sheppard grabbed under his forearm and tugged him into a standing position.

Zelenka was standing next to them holding a handful of tissues. "For the blood," he said to the boy, but Rodney continued to stare with his darkened eyes. He seemed unaware of what has happening

"Jesus Rodney," Sheppard whispered taking the tissue and wiping the blood slightly before grabbing Rodney's hand. "Hold this and tilt your head back." Rodney complied with little resistance. Taking one last hard look at Kavanaugh, Sheppard guided Rodney out of the lab.

It was a longest trip Sheppard had every taken to the infirmary. Halfway there, Sheppard had removed his hand to radio Carson. It took him a moment to realize that Rodney had stopped moving. He looked back to see him standing in the middle of the hallway, halfheartedly holding a bloody tissue to his nose. His eyes were dark, staring out blankly. Sheppard doubted that the boy really knew what was going on around him at the moment. He quickly told Carson that it might take a while to get to the infirmary before he turned back to his friend. "Come on Rodney, we need to get you to Carson." Sheppard said as he walked up to the boy. Once again he put a hand on his friend's shoulder, but this time Rodney recoiled slightly. The boy's whole body was tense and on edge. "Hey, buddy. I'm not going to hurt you." He said softly. He'd realized that Rodney wouldn't move without someone pulling him forward, so he gave him a gentle pull tofollow.

Rodney looked up at Sheppard, but didn't say anything. John was slowly beginning to understand what was happening. Rodney was shutting down; protecting himself for the next blow that he thought was coming. He knew that he had to do something. He took on quick look around and then quickly steered Rodney into an almost empty supply room. Sheppard pick Rodney up, ignoring the way the boy tensed, and placed him on one of the crates. "Talk to me, Rodney," he said and he knelt in front of the boy. Rodney just continued to stare blankly at him over the tissue. He had to stop himself from sighing in frustration as he checked the boy's nose. It had stopped bleeding so he figured that Beckett could wait a few minutes. "I know that you're scared, but you don't have to be. No one is going to hurt you, not like your father." Sheppard noticed that Rodney stiffened at mention of his father; it was a start. "You're shutting everybody out, and I know that you're smart enough to see that this strategy isn't working. So please talk to me; yell, kick, scream, anything! Just don't shut me out Rodney."

Rodney still didn't answer but he was looking him like he actually saw him. Sheppard was about to give up, when he heard Rodney mutter something that sounded like 'this sucks." He waited for him to continue, but nothing followed.

"If you're not going to talk to me Rodney, then I'm going to ask questions and you're going to answer, alright?"

Rodney nodded feebly.

"Rodney, I wanted to ask you something about you mother?" The boy's face paled and he quickly looked away from the Colonel. "I saw a little of your file, and realized that, for you, your mother died… a couple of weeks ago and…."

"So, what was your question?" Sheppard was startled by the harsh edge of Rodney's quiet voice.

"Are you ok? I mean, your mother just died." He didn't respond or even look up at Sheppard, but it seemed like something had changed in Rodney. His body language was almost defensive. "I remember I cried for almost a week when my mother died. I don't even think I really left the house for a month."

"I don't deserve to cry," he whispered so softly that Sheppard almost didn't hear it.

At first, he didn't respond because Sheppard honestly didn't know what to say. "That's not true, Rodney. No matter what anyone says…" He watched as Rodney's expression changed to one that looked like guilt, his eyes full of unshed tears. Something was off about this entire situation. "What's wrong Rodney?"

"What do you want me to say?" He looked at Sheppard with tear-filled eyes. "That I think about my mother all the time. How about the fact that I never got to say goodbye! Or even better, that my father blames me for her being dead and that he might be right!" Rodney yelled at John, tears falling silently down his face. John was about to say something when he continued. "I didn't even get to go to mom's funeral! He got so mad that when he stopped hitting me, he had to take me to the hospital. He told them that I felt so guilty about what happened that I got into a fight with some kids. She died because of me and I couldn't even say goodbye. He didn't want me to go, so he left me at the hospital." John reached out to him but was pushed back. "DON'T TOUCH ME!"

"God Rodney, it wasn't your fault."

"Yes, it was! I ran out of the house. She was looking for me. She went out looking for me and she got hit…" Rodney couldn't complete the sentence. His shoulders shook as he sobbed silently.

"Rodney, you can't hold yourself responsible for what happens to other people. You have no control over that. What happened to your mother was an accident." It was those words that seemed to break Rodney. Sheppard reached out to Rodney again. This time he didn't resist. He let out a cry and collapsed forward sobbing into Sheppard's vest. Slowly the Colonel wrapped his arms around the crying boy.

Sheppard let Rodney cry, until the tears stopped and he was holding a silent shaking mass. "I miss her," he whimpered. Sheppard didn't respond. He just tightened his grip and lifted Rodney into his arms.

"Let's get you to Carson before they send out a search party, alright?" Sheppard barely heard the muffled response coming from his shoulder. Without another word, he carried Rodney out of the storage room and to the infirmary. The rest of the trip would have been completely uneventful, if it wasn't for the fact that Rodney tightened his grip on Sheppard's vest every time someone passed them. By the time they finally reached the infirmary, Sheppard was hoping that Rodney's father was dead; because if the man wasn't, he was going to kill him.

Carson was waiting for them when they reached the infirmary. The doctor waited until the Colonel placed the boy on the bed and sat down next to him, before he said anything. He didn't fail to notice the way Rodney kept one hand attached to Sheppard at all times. "So Zelenka tells me that you had an accident in the labs. Can ya tell me what happened lad?" Carson gave Sheppard a brief look when he didn't get a response. He carefully examined Rodney's nose and face for any serious damage; wiping away the blood that remained on his face. He didn't like the way Rodney shied away from his touch, or his eerie silence. "Well, the bleeding has stopped. The good news is that I don't think it's broken. From what I was told, you hit your head as well?"

"He knocked into a desk when he fell," Sheppard responded when Rodney didn't.

"Well, I'll get you something for that in a moment, Rodney." Carson said as he straightened up. He turned to the Colonel next, "but first Sheppard, Weir wanted you to report to her as soon as you came in. Also, I wanted to talk to you about a certain file that I found left _open_ on my desk." Sheppard silently cursed at getting caught, but knew that there was nothing he could do about it at the moment.

"I'll talk to Weir after you get the aspirin, and I'm sure that the other discussion can wait." Carson was about to tell him that Weir wanted his report ASAP, when someone else interrupted.

"I'll watch him." Both men almost jumped when they heard Ronon's low voice.

"Jesus, Ronon, what did I tell you about sneaking up on people." Sheppard exclaimed. He was surprised that Rodney didn't react, but realized he must have seen him coming when they were talking. Ronon just shrugged. Knowing that Rodney would be fine in Ronon's hands and the fact that Weir didn't like being in the dark for long, Sheppard slowly got up from the gurney. "I'll be back in a second, Rodney." Sheppard waited until he nodded weakly before turning back to Ronon. "Stay here and watch him." He ordered

Ronon responded by sitting down on the gurney across from Rodney. After a moment, Beckett and Sheppard left with a swift goodbye.

They sat in silence for a good three minutes; Ronon looking at Rodney and Rodney looking at the wall. "You want to talk about it?" Ronon asked as he shifted to get a better look at the boy's developing black eye.

Rodney turned to glare at him. "No," he snapped back, before looking anywhere except at the runner.

"Then what are you are going to do?" He asked simply, bringing the boy's attention back to Ronon.

He paused a moment before responding softly, "I hate Kavanaugh. Even as an adult, I know that I hate him. I also know that they're going to fix me soon, so if I ever wanted to get back at him for all the crap he's pulled, without any major repercussion…" He didn't finish his thought however, since Rodney knew that he'd never be allowed the opportunity. He sat quietly looking down at the floor.

"Unless…"

He let out a sigh. "Let me leave," he asked without looking up. No one could say that he didn't try.

Ronon grinned widely. "The Colonel told me to _stay_ here and watch you, McKay." And as if to prove a point, he moved to sit down in the chair next to the bed.

Rodney was about to protest, when he realized what the Satedan meant. He was about to thank Ronon, when the man stopped him, telling him that he shouldn't thank him yet. Rodney looked around to see if anyone was paying attention to them. Ronon watched the boy pick up a couple of things from the table by the bed, before stealing out the room. He made himself comfortably in the chair next to the bed. It took him about another five minutes to come to the realization that Sheppard was going to be pissed.

Almost as if on cue, Sheppard walked out from Beckett's office to find Ronon sitting by an empty bed. "Where the hell is Rodney?" He almost screamed. "I told you to watch him."

Ronon stood up, masking his smile. "I did," was his only response.

"Then where is he?" The Colonel stressed each word carefully.

"I watched him take a right out the door." Ronon answered plainly. "Rodney mentioned something about getting back at Kavanaugh." He added, when he realized that a pissed Sheppard wasn't as funny as he thought it would be.

Sheppard was shocked for a moment, but quickly recovered. "I'll deal with you later, Ronon." He was out the door before the man could respond; and he was halfway to the labs, when he got the call from Elizabeth.


	7. Getting Even

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters... unfortunately

AN: Sorry about the wait. A friend of mine died last month and I've been having a hard time about it. But things seem to be back on track, I wanted to thank everyone who commented (I'd list you all but it'd take up to much room!). I really appreicated it, they were the final push that got me to finish the chapter. You guys have my deepest thanks!

The story is past the halfway point so hopefully I'll have this finished in a timely manner. I'm debating whether or not to write a sequel... it all depends on how I end this, so I guess time will tell. Read, enjoy, and review.

Beta'd by AKAazosah, any mistakes found are my own. Enjoy.

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Rodney ran down the halls as fast as he could, only stopping to avoid the occasional person wandering around. He listened to the headpiece that he'd stolen from the infirmary hoping that no one knew that he was gone yet. By the time he made it to his room he half expected someone to be there waiting for him. As the door opened, Rodney let out a breath he didn't realize he was holding when all he saw was the empty room.

Even before the door closed, Rodney was scrambling to get everything he needed. Grabbing his laptop, a life sign reader, and a power bar, he left, aware of the fact that this would be the first place they'd look for him. He didn't go far from his room, knowing that he didn't have much time to do anything. Sitting in a deserted hallway, he let his hands move from memory over the laptop keyboard to configure his head piece to an all access emergency channel. The fact that he could use all of this equipment should have fazed him, but using the computer only gave him a strange sense of familiarity.

"-naugh, could you please report to my office? I'd like to have a word with you." Said a stern voice over the headpiece, Dr. Weir, Rodney thought briefly.

"I don't see what the big deal is here. It was an accident!" Rodney cringed slightly at the sound of Kavanaugh's voice.

"_Now_, Doctor," Dr. Weir's voice didn't leave much room for discussion.

"Fine," Kavanaugh huffed before cutting out of the channel.

Rodney let the headpiece fall as he searched the scanner. Luckily, he found one lone reading leaving Kavanaugh's quarters. Rodney saw that the man was heading towards the transporter, when he realized the perfect payback.

Rodney worked as fast as he could as he accessed the transporter schematics and entered his override codes. He only had about two minutes to get this right and somehow he felt like that was more than enough time. He finished with five seconds to spare before Kavanaugh entered the transporter.

That'll teach the pompous prick, he thought bitterly as he opened the power bar. Rodney reset all of his changes, except for two, and set his radio on top of the laptop. When he was finished with the bar, he stood up leaving everything behind except the life-sign detector. He knew that if they weren't looking for him before, they definitely would be now. The only thing he could really do was wait until they found him, but he didn't have to make it easy for them by standing still.

As Rodney wandered the halls, his growing headache made him realize that he should have waited for Carson to give him some aspirin before leaving the infirmary. He was halfway to his quarters to get some of his own, when he thought he heard something behind him. He ducked around the nearest corner and looked at the scanner in his hand; no one was close enough to hear.

He was about to continue on when his head started to throb and his vision seemed to flicker. Rodney pushed forward trying to regain his bearing but it was getting harder to concentrate. Turning the corner, he stopped dead in his tracks when he saw someone standing in front of him. Rodney stumbled and fell down; never taking his eyes off on the girl in front of him. "Jeanie," he whispered. She didn't look at him, just continued to stare ahead of her. She was older looking then the last time he could remember. The one thing that stood out the most, however, was that she was crying.

Rodney stuttered, trying to say anything, when he heard someone walking up behind him. He turned to see Major Lorne walking towards him. Rodney quickly turned back to see that his sister was gone.

"There you are," Lorne stated, as he walked up to the boy sitting on the floor staring down the hall. "You know how many people are looking for you?" he asked. Rodney turned back to look at him and then back towards the hall. Lorne saw the boy's mouth open and close, almost like a fish. "A speechless McKay, wow, wish I had my camera," he added with a smile. Rodney scrambled to his feet; Lorne almost missed how the boy swayed slightly before he was able to settle himself.

"Are you taking me back to the infirmary?" Rodney avoided making direct eye contact as he talked.

"That was the original plan," he stated as he placed a hand the boy's shoulder. When Rodney recoiled slightly, he gave him a reassuring squeeze before leading him towards the nearest transporter. "But a funny thing happened while we were looking for you; it seems that Kavanaugh went missing on his way to Dr. Weir's office. You wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?" Lorne asked with a smirk.

"Not a thing," he grumbled in response.

Lorne looked down at McKay and could tell the kid was miserable even without the shiner. "You had this place in an uproar, you know that McKay?" He waited until Rodney looked up before continuing, "We were all worried."

"Don't waste your time," he muttered softly.

Lorne laughed softly. "Don't think I can do that, you've saved my ass too many times. Beside Kavanaugh, I think that everyone's been worried. I know that the science team has been working overtime trying to fix this." Lorne waved open the transporter and guided a quiet Rodney in. He continued when they stepped out, "I'm a little embarrassed to say this but you really surprised me McKay. You're a better man then I ever really gave you credit for." That comment got Rodney's attention; however, they had just reached Dr. Weir's office. "She doesn't look to happy. Good luck, McKay." He whispered as he walked off. Rodney's eyes were locked on Lorne as he went back the way they had come. He was so shocked by the man's comment that he didn't realize that Weir had called his name.

"Rodney," she repeated a little an exasperated.

"What!" He snapped back, as he turned, forgetting who he was talking to. He turned to see Dr. Weir sitting behind her desk and a slightly amused Sheppard sitting in one of her chairs.

"Excuse me?" She bristled. Sheppard faked a cough to hide his amusement. "I don't think I like that tone you're using and considering how much trouble you're in at the moment, I don't think it's appropriate either." A memory of Rodney's mother sadly looking down on him forced its way to his mind. The pair watched the boy close his eyes tight for a brief moment before he made his way to the other unoccupied chair.

"Fine, I'm sorry," he finally responded. Sheppard noticed that he looked worn out; too worn out for only being gone for thirty minutes. "What can I do for you?" He asked, which would have sounded sincere if it weren't drowning in sarcasm.

Weir paused for a moment. "Rodney, I know that no one can truly begin to understand how difficult this must be for you. That being said, things haven't been easy for the rest of us either." Elizabeth decided to ignore the eye roll. "With you… out of commission and half the science team working on this problem… we were struggling enough as it was before this whole situation. You aren't making things any easier with this recent stunt."

"I don't know what you're talking about," Rodney responded calmly.

"Kavanaugh," was her only response. Rodney looked away and out towards the gate. He doubted that he would be able to actually activate the gate and make it through, but it was nice to dream.

"What about him?" He didn't even try to hide the distain in his voice.

Sheppard could tell that Weir was at the end of her rope, considering the recent pressures with the NID and the ever present threat of the wraith. "Rodney," he interjected. "I think we all know that you had a hand in the sudden… disappearance of Dr. Kavanaugh." Rodney slumped slightly in the chair under the Colonel's gaze. "So why don't we just cut to the part where you say you're sorry and tell us what you did."

Rodney finally looked up to see that Sheppard didn't look amused anymore. His head was still pounding and it didn't look like Elizabeth was going to let him leave until he told them. "Can I see your computer?" He asked her with a great sigh as he shifted the chair closer to the desk. Elizabeth detached her computer from the stand and placed it in front Rodney. He quickly pulled up a schematic of the city. "He's here." Rodney pointed to the southern most tip of Atlantis, as he knelt on the chair to work at a better angle.

"How did he get there? That part of the city isn't powered," Weir asked in a stern voice. "Shouldn't we be able to see him on the scanners or contact him through his radio?"

"Not if I masked his life sign from the scanners and programmed the computers to not recognize his radio broadcast." Rodney said all this as he typed on the computer, undoing all of his previous work; but in twice the time it should have took. If he looked up, he would have seen a shocked and slightly furious Weir. "I temporarily routed power to the section, in particular the transporter, and changed some of the transporter code. No matter what destination he chose, he would have been sent there."

"Remind me never to get on your bad side." Sheppard said softly, which earned him a glare from Weir. She was not pleased. When he looked back at Rodney, he noticed that his eyes were squinted and his body language was tense

"That was very reckless of you, Rodney. Frankly, I'm shocked. He could be seriously hu-"

"It's fixed," he interrupted. "You can tell him that the transporter is working again." Rodney slid off the chair and looked squarely that Dr. Weir. "I'm _not_ saying sorry. So if we're done here I'd liked to get back to my room. I'm a little tired and my _head_ _hurts_ a bit." The fact that he stressed the word hurt wasn't lost on either of them. Seeing that no one was stopping him, Rodney walked out the door quickly, before they could change their minds.

"He's certainly sounding more like his old self." Elizabeth commented, "but I'm not sure that makes me entirely happy."

"Carson did say that this could happen, when enough of his memories came back…" Sheppard left the dangers of this unspoken, since they already knew what could happen. Rodney would break, given enough time. The two sat silently for a moment, as if a solution would come to them out of thin air. That was until Sheppard remembered something important. "Shouldn't we contact Kavanaugh now?"

Sheppard made his way back to his room. After they had contacted the missing scientist and made sure he was safe; he had decided that he didn't really need to be party to what he was sure to be an exciting reunion and quickly excused himself. It took him about two seconds upon entering the room to realize that Rodney was there. The drawer where he stashed his power bars was opened; his once made bed was a small mountain of blankets and slight movement, and there was a pile of equipment next to his desk that didn't belong to him.

Kicking off his shoes on the way to his bed, Sheppard listened carefully. He almost thought that he heard sniffling. He sat down gently next to the mass, "you want to talk about it?"

"No," the mass responded firmly.

Always the stubborn one, he thought to himself, but he knew better then to push his friend. "Well I'm going to try to get some work done," Sheppard said as he stood up, patting the blankets softly. "Give me a holler if you need anything." He might have heard a grunt in response, but he wasn't really sure. He made a quick detour on the way to his desk to get something from his bathroom. He placed a glass of water and two Tylenol on his night stand before settling in to finish his long neglected paper work. He was five minutes in, when he heard movement and glanced back to see a hand reach out and take the pills and water.

He saw Rodney shifting to get more comfortable and knew that the boy would be sleeping soon. Sheppard wondered how long Rodney would be able to sleep before a nightmare would wake him. He remembered that Zelenka had said two days until the device was fixed. He prayed that the man was right.

--TBC--


End file.
